city lights, lonely nights

heart broke as soon as it hit me that my apartment was empty again,
I'm a pretty weak person for someone that breaks down thinking of my family and being all alone

"weakest of them all"

economics papers tomorrow, unprepared like a kid that doesn't know how to swim and got thrown into the deepest water by a horrible father. i know i'm not the only one having downs in life and mine might just be the size of a peanut compared to others that are facing bigger problems. but this is me and my problem, i have to face it myself and grow stronger from it. am i right?

it's easier said then done.
it's always easier said then done.

I have so many questions that are unanswered,
why am I not as strong as I used to be?
was I ever even strong?
why can't studying be a natural flow to me like my other friends?
why am i struggling so badly when i already know my weaknesses?
why do I have to go through all this alone?
or am I not alone?