my first post

Hello, I'm not sure who am I referring my hello to but if you're a random reader that trip yourself and accidentally found my blog, well nice to meet you.

I keep back spacing every sentence I type because I think twice and wonder if it is relevant to be read by other people. Would you guys care and have opinions of my thoughts? Well, that's for you to answer. I'm the kind of person that would say I wouldn't care about what people think of me but deep inside, I tend to over think that particular sentence or opinion or statement that a friend or stranger said about me.

I tend to get information from friends that tell me about all the "he said she said" about me and think a lot about it. I don't live a perfect life, neither do you but if you do then congratulations. I'm not the kind of person that actually wants attention but my heart tends to feel all warm and fuzzy when I get little compliments from friends and when somebody notices the little good deeds I do without a reason.

Right now, I feel so empty, maybe that's the reason why I'm typing this post right now. Forgive me if my post seems very immature and irrelevant or don't if you want to, it's your choice.

I'm at that teenage phrase where I have to choose a course or a career for my future. I know growing up we have been asked the same question over and over again by adults. "What do you want to be when you grow up?" Little Sarah answered those questions with actress, singer, fashion designer, wedding planner and even crime scene investigator. How silly was I? But honestly, I admired how little Sarah used to dream really big as in like famous hollywood big star kind of big. When things got more serious, like adults actually want a serious answer from you. High school Sarah answered lawyer. A plain straight answer, "Lawyer". I never thought it through about actually being lawyer and recently this year I have. I can't seem to picture myself as a lawyer, it just don't go together with my personality.

If I were to describe myself in five words, it would

"unpredictable", "blessed", "weird", "straightforward" and "bubbly"

To be honest, it actually took me quite some time to think which five words I can choose to describe myself. I asked a few close friends to describe me in five words and most of them chose, "pretty", "nice", "funny", "cute", "beautiful", "loveable"and "friendly". But the big question in my mind is, am I really am?